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Jeffrey Streeter's avatar

I really enjoyed this. And this part especially: "A voice inside her whispered: maybe things happen for a reason. People said that a lot. But she knew from experience it wasn’t quite like that. She didn’t believe in religious bullshit. Things happened; you had to make them part of your story."

Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

Thanks so much Jeffrey! Appreciate this.

I’ve been working on a different manuscript since “finishing” this one (maybe to be edited after these posts!) so I’m also like: is she harming herself with non-belief? Is she a proper philosopher or misguided? I can’t remember exactly how she sorts herself out. :)

Jeffrey Streeter's avatar

A properly misguided philosopher?

Alexander Ipfelkofer's avatar

Excellent continuation, giving us more insight into Ivy's journey. I liked the transition from home to the doc and back, esp the intertextual link to Macbeth: "This was the one doorman at Royal Terrace who did engage somewhat with the dwellers of his castle. He had teeth the colour of the oolong tea he drank from a large thermos all day long. His standard issue uniform hung and crumpled off of his skeletal figure. He muttered unintelligible things as she went by which she imagined he meant to be helpful."

Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

Thank you, Alexander!

I really love the porter in Macbeth. I guess I love all those Shakespearean minor characters - Yorrick, pirates, Romeo’s pharmacist. You know. Appreciate your appreciation of the layers.

Alexander Ipfelkofer's avatar

Tom Snout is my fave, mainly because I played him on stage 😅

The Apothecary! Of course, fantastic. I mentioned Rosencrantz and Guildenstern during my lecture as an example how to tell a story from a different POV, excellent exercise for anyone to take their story and tell it from a different character's perspective. changes everything! looking forward to the next chapters, I saw we also go to Bali at some point!

Kate Jones's avatar

So many layers to this, Kate! Only just caught up with reading. Such a visceral piece of writing. Thank you for sharing :)

Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

Many thanks Kate 🤗☺️

Nathan Slake's avatar

I really feel for Ivy here. Georg's seeming lack of verbal communication hurts. This was a great line: "It began to fill her emptiness but made the emptiness of their communication even more tangible."

Eespecially loved the interaction and dialogue with the taxi driver. The sparse attribution works perfectly because its so clear which character is talking based on what they're talking about.

(Also, I learnt something about Macbeth and the porter. Didn't know that/hadn't paid attention in English Lit in school 😂)

Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

Thanks Nathan! ☺️ I like to play around with using the same word again in a sentence or the one after as an intentional shifting of signification. I’m happy it had a positive effect. Does this make sense?

And yay the taxi driver. I always have a hard time with dialogue so really appreciate that!

Haha I probably would forget a lot of these Shakespearean details if I weren’t an English teacher as well. 🤓 💫

Nathan Slake's avatar

Totally. So good. Keep it up.

Looking forward to whatever you have in store for us this week 😃

Mr. Troy Ford's avatar

I'm struck by the gaping disconnect between Ivy and Georg, how his facile nonchalance about her miscarriage has revealed a deep dis-ease, as though a wound opened up to reveal a cancer that had gone undiagnosed. Team Ivy is angry and bereft. 🩷🧡❤️

Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

Like a cancer...yes I like that. Team Ivy 🙌🏽

Thanks so much, Troy 😊🩵

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Nov 11, 2023
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Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

Oh Nadia, this is such a beautiful comment. 💗💗 Thank you so much!

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Nov 11, 2023
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Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

🩵🩵

Also I did not think of it that way structurally. You give me something to think about.

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Nov 11, 2023
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Kathleen Clare Waller's avatar

Nice 💥 I’ll keep that in mind when I dig into all these game recs